Meltdown Update

Alright folks, its been nearly a week since my "poor me" tantrum, just thought I'd post a little update.

I've been doing my back exercises religiously, accepted a new position at work (more on that after the announcement is made), got TWO new pairs of sassy boots from Prince Charming, put my costume together for this year's Race For The Cure (go Pink Pirates!), and have for some odd reason decided that I need a stripper pole for "exercise" in my house. All in all, a pretty good week.

I am very aware and a little worried that the good vibes are coming from all of the "new" going on. I am one of those people that is recharged by new. New job, new shoes, new makeup, new clothes... See where I'm going here? Luckily, the upcoming weeks involve lots of "new" for me. Next week I will start with my new at work, and I'm cutting FOURTEEN INCHES off of my hair to donate to someone who has lost their hair because of chemo. I'm heading over the mountains to Denver for a week of the Race For The Cure, a visit with my new neurologist, a conference for my new position and only two days at home to regroup before a trip to Wisconsin to see family.

I am a little concerned about what happens when all that craziness slows down, but for now, I'm just gonna sit back and enjoy the crazy. For some reason, when life is crazy, I'm a bit more sane.

As If You Didn't See This Coming...

Well, after my "rah-rah-go-me" girl power post yesterday I freaked out. Lost. My. Shit. Who didn't see that coming?

One minute, we're cleaning up the house, the next minute I'm sobbing on the floor because my husband made a crack about me being lame and I took it as an attack on my character. Not cool.

My husband wrote down some things that I said in the height of my little crash to rock bottom for me, and I thought I would share:

• I feel worthless
• I am a burden to this family
• I feel like giving up
• I hurt all the time
  
• I don't want to try anymore

Wow, you'd think that someone that went to school for psychology would've seen some of these textbook warning signs. Unfortunately, it took my husband writing this down and making me read it out loud to realize that my mind is in a very ugly place. Until my mind is in a good place, my body is not going to get better.

Long story short, I spent an hour or two sobbing on the floor before my husband talked me into putting my big girl panties back on and righting myself. I've given myself 60 days to start liking myself a little bit better, or I'll suck it up and ask for help beyond what my ever-supportive family and friends are giving me.

After a lot of snotty sniffling and soul searching, my ever-amazing husband came up with a new list for me. I am to do the following:

• Do my back exercises three times a day
• Spend 15 minutes a day of quiet time to re-focus on my determination to get better
• Pick up my shit around the house
• Ask for help
• Stay focused (0n getting better)

He is going to do everything else. I am no longer allowed to feel guilty that he is doing the laundry, mowing the lawn, or lifting heavy things.

Sounds pretty easy, right? Unfortunately, dealing with chronic pain is exhausting. It can make the simplest of tasks seem daunting. You start out well, with a positive attitude and a smile on your face. You can't do it all, but you can hold your own. Life is pretty good. Things start getting overlooked at home, but the important things get taken care of. You're tired, and a little stressed, but you manage. Soon, little things start piling up, you start feeling helpless, and it all builds until it all comes crashing down. By the end, it is too much to even get out of bed fifteen minutes earlier to do my hair. It sounds silly, but sometimes, that is the straw. The cycle I'm on seems to last about six months. The positive side? At least every six months I start over with a smile on my face and a renewed sense of faith.

Today, life is good, and my hair looks great.

All The Things You Never Needed To Know

This website was started with several goals in mind, the most important one being therapy. Not for the unfortunate souls who stumble upon this site, but for the two brilliant minds behind it.

We have spent countless hours entertaining, supporting, and laughing at each other, and felt that a blog might be a good place for us to dump all of our random mutterings. Somewhere that we could save and share all of our hilarious thoughts, stories, and photos. On a more serious side, we also thought writing things down would be good therapy and help make us better writers. Nothing personal, dear Internet, but this was all selfish, and to hell with you if you didn't like it.

Obviously, we hope that some of the things that we rant and rave about will entertain those of you out there, especially if you're so entertained that you feel compelled to click on an ad. Ultimately, we'd love to be able to thank this website for a night out on the town or a new pair of shoes (*wink, wink*).

On a more serious note, writing has always been a way for me to work out what I'm feeling, get things out, and move on. Unfortunately, the past year of my life has been extremely emotionally and physically trying, and I've looked to this site more for levity than therapy. Lucky for you all, today I've decided to take my life back, which means that hopefully, I'll be writing more around here that makes people want to visit this site on a regular basis (and maybe even click some ads! think of the shoes, people!) and get to know Bones and myself a little better. I figure if I'm gonna be sharing my deepest, darkest thoughts (and of course, the most shallow, don't worry, there is an abundance of shallow in my head these days) that y'all might want to know a little bit about who I am. If you don't, quit reading.

I think part of the problem I've had with really getting going with my writing on this site is that I have a very hard time defining "me" so that is where I'm going to start.

Today I am in a productive, list-making kind of mood, so I'm just gonna start typing and see where this goes.

• I am a 28 year old mom to two of the awesomest dogs ever.
• I am married to a man who's idol is Peter Pan. I love this about him.
• I am an unrecognized princess. Ask anyone who knows me, they're cool with it.
• I am (usually) the good kind of crazy.
• I hate doing laundry.
  
• I have the greatest friends. Ever.
• I love shopping, I could turn a convenience store outing into a retail experience.
• I'm not very good at being organized.
  
• I'm lucky enough to be called "auntie" by two (soon to be three!) of the coolest kids ever.
• I have a bad back. At 28. It is trying to take over my life, but I'm not gonna let it.
• I love love love to travel. Anywhere. I don't just want to see the world, I want to experience it.
• I love to cook for the people I love. Must be the maternal instinct in me. Give me a tormented soul, and I'll pull up a chair and some comfort food.
• I'm an amateur photographer. Better than my writing, thank goodness.
• I've been slapped in the face with a pickle. A real pickle. We'll talk about it sometime.
• In the last year, I've gotten married, lost one of my best friends, had surgery, gained some new friends, gotten promoted, met new family members, and helped complete some major construction projects at home. Its been a busy year.
• I still haven't taken a honeymoon. That is going to be a priority this year.
• I have an iPhone and I love it.
• I may be a little addicted to MySpace and Twitter.
• I love rice krispie treats just as much as creme brulee.
  
• Sometimes I still need my mom.
• I love books. All kinds. If you have any suggestions, leave them in the comments. I will read them.
• I believe that you can never have too many friends or too much time to spend with them.
• When I have a bad day, I buy shoes online. I also get shoes if I'm a good girl at the doctor.
  
• I spend a lot of time at the doctor. It is emotionally and financially draining.
• I love sparkly things.
• I am a natural blonde.
• My husband may be a saint. He has spent endless hours driving me to various doctor appointments, comforting me when I'm scared, and picking up the slack at home when I can't get out of bed. He even gets me ice packs for my ass. Isn't that sweet?
  
• I believe that honesty and good manners will get you far in life.
• Pedicures make me feel pretty.
  
• I love lazy Sunday mornings with my family.
• I can be selfish, irrational, and moody. I promise if you stick around you'll also see that I'm caring, generous, and fun.
• I want to be a mom someday.
• 
• I am terrified of failing my loved ones.
• I hurt, every day. It is exhausting.
  
• Sometimes I say I'm okay when I hurt, because I think people are tired of hearing about how I'm feeling all the time.
• I love good tequila.
• I hate being cold, but I love getting snowed in with my hubby.
• Coffee is worth its weight in gold in my house.
• I love the beach.
• I live in the mountains.
  
• As I get older, I find more value in staying in with a few good friends than in a wild night out on the town. (although, the wild nights do have their place...)

I am hoping that throwing this out there will open me up to picking a point and writing about it. Any and all feedback is always appreciated. If you're an asshole, I reserve the right to ridicule, mock, or delete any crappy comments I don't like. This is my website, if you don't like it, don't come back. If you do like it, I'll try to make it worth your while.

Yaar, Bitches!

Ahoy, mateys! Today is International Talk Like a Pirate Day, so grab a jug 'o grog and brush up on the lingo! (if you have trouble with that, check out the TLPD Translator!)

I myself plan to make it a short day at the office today to get an early start on my evening of plunder and pillage!

Free Handbag Giveaway!

A new website, Handbag Planet, is being launched on October 15th, and they are giving away a free handbag every hour for 24 hours on the day of the launch! The bags are designs that are inspired by popular designer brands, and are priced between $30 and $80, so even if you don't win a bag, this site is a great place to get cute bags without breaking the bank!

After signing up, you select which bag you'd like to win -no strings attached. I have tried the submission process, and everything seems pretty clear. Sign up, hope to win a bag!

There are some adorable bags up for grabs, good luck to everyone!

One Down, 75(ish) More To Go...

We made it through our first year! YAY!


Congratulations, Team Jones.

I've Realized...

My body is not as tough as it used to be.

Somebody Play With Me!!

Once upon a time, there was a sleepy snail named Jim.

Jim:








Jim had Labor Day off from work, but volunteered to earn some extra cash. They fed Jim pizza for lunch, and it was very tasty. However, Jim was the most very bored snail in the whole office and desperately wanted his snail friends to email him. Too bad Jim’s friends all had the day off. Poor Jim.
Yes. This is how incredibly under-stimulated I am today!
WHERE IS EVERYBODY??